Epiphany

Epiphany, meaning appearance or manifestation, is a Christian feast intended to celebrate the "shining forth" or revelation of God in human form, to the Gentiles, in the person of Jesus. Some Christians commemorate the visitation of the Magi to the child Jesus on this day... (from Wikipedia)

What a fitting day to return, with my children, to church. We went to the local Presbyterian community church -- much more in line with my beliefs and philosophy than the local Southern Baptist church -- and although it's small and struggling a bit without a pastor, I felt rather at home again. For now. While I wait. For what, I know not; my entire life is suspended at the moment, and as I continue having to let go of pieces of my life -- the store I worked so hard to get running and make beautiful, the home I made for my family, the cats, one of our dogs (I had to give Maisy away last week because she was suffering so much living outside in the cold), any hopes and plans any future I might have wanted -- I feel stripped bare. I have no choice but to surrender. Letting go means loss, and God knows I'm feeling it every day. But it also opens my heart and my spirit to a divine transforming power that will take me to a better place in my life. An Al-Anon slogan reminds me that "God's plan for your life is to be happy, joyous, and free" -- and sometimes, obviously now, I have to step out of the way and throw my own agenda out the window in order for that plan to manifest.

No pain, no palm;
no thorns, no throne;
no gall, no glory;
no cross, no crown.
(William Penn, No Cross, No Crown, 1669)

Lookin' on the bright side and all that.